2015 Lollapalooza: Best and Worst

Twenty percent of my body is covered in mosquito bite scars; seventy percent of my skin is unusually tan; and it's one hundred percent Lollapalooza's fault. As always, there were a lot of great moments that marked the last Lolla of my 20's. Next year I'll be 30 and even more spiteful toward the crop-top-wearing teenagers who represent everything wrong with music fans today. Every spring when it's time to buy Lolla tickets I think to myself, "Is this really worth it?" I hesitate for a moment and then realize, yes, it's completely worth it. I've gotten to see so many bands and artists that I love over the past six years. Here are the best and worst moments from this year's Lollapalooza...

The Lolla Crew + The Beard = Three Days of Magic. Also I think there is a correlation between how cool Annika's hair is to how large my glasses get.

Best Stage: Pepsi

We referred to this stage all weekend as The Grove (last year's name). A couple years ago this stage was called Google+. Next year I'm sure we'll be heading to the iHeartRadio stage so Lollapalooza can keep up the trend of blending irrelevant marketing with up-and-coming artists. The only horrible band we saw at Pepsi The Grove this year was Lion Babe, but I think that's mostly our fault for giving a "band" named Lion Babe a try. I really enjoyed seeing Zella Day and FKA Twigs here this year.

If you mix Pennsatucky from Orange is The New Black with Lykke Li you would get Zella Day.

Lion Babe was all-hair and no-talent.

Best Day: Friday

When the Porta Potties still have toilet paper and Paul McCartney closes you know it's going to be the best day. Other highlights were Father John Misty, Alabama Shakes, and Gary Clark Jr.

Finally got to see Alabama Shakes and they were amazing. We got rained out of their 2012 performance.

Best Throwback: Metallic

I refuse to call McCartney a throwback because in my heart The Beatles never left. Bryan had been listening to Metallic months in preparation for their Saturday set. In turn, I prepared my most metal faces. For not knowing 99 percent of their music, I had a really fun time. The jumbo screens looked awesome and gave us a great view not only of the band but the sign language interpreter, who was signing so intensely I forgot that Metallic was even playing.

The screens were awesome!

I'm so intimated by us.

Best Closer: Paul McCartney

I've read a few different lists of "Things You'll Regret When You're Old" and they almost always include "missing the chance to see your favorite musicians." I consider myself extremely lucky to have seen nearly every musician that I love play a live show. That's the thought that was running through my head as Paul McCartney walked on stage. I remember listening to Beatles songs as a kid in my Dad's car as he drove me to school. In college I have the best memories listening to The Beatles as I drove back and forth between Peoria and my Washington apartment. While seeing McCartney isn't exactly the same thing as seeing The Beatles I realize that it's as close as I'll ever get, and it was pretty darn amazing.

I was probably already tearing up at this point.

Surprise guest, Brittany Howard from Alabama Shakes joins Paul on stage!!

What makes a Wing's song better? Fireworks. The answer is always, fireworks.

Best Food: Cheese fries

I was super disappointed by the food and drink this year. Once again, no mustard catfish. The Farmer's Market was pathetic with no River Valley Kitchen (goodbye, mushroom nachos). Robert Mondavi was the wine sponsor and offered no free swag at the wine tent. Our relaxing oasis from last year turned into a corporate snooze. The lobster corndog was as good as it's always been, but this was the year of the cheese fry.

Our smiles say, "This isn't Thorny Rose's riesling."

Worst Stage: Sprint
You know that part in Harry Potter 4 when the Weasley twins are trying to put their name into the Goblet of Fire, but they get kicked out from Dumbledore's aging line? That's what it's like going anywhere near Perry's. Every time we walked past I could feel a long white beard start to grow out my chin as I hunched over my walker, the tennis ball feet catching on crushed Bud Light cans. Perry's is the true Kidzapalooza. The worst part of Perry's? It ruins the Sprint stage. It's almost impossible to ignore the constant bass from Perry's while you're trying to hear anything at Sprint.

There's the Sprint stage over there in the corner. Where it belongs.

Worst Day: Sunday
Is Sunday always the worst day? Is that like a kid at summer camp complaining that the last day is the worst because you have to go home tomorrow? I'm not sure. I've never been to summer camp, but I did religiously watch Salute Your Shorts as a kid so I'm pretty sure I got the gist. And going back to work? Totally worse than going back home. Just saying, eight-year-old Allison. I'm getting off topic. Here's why Sunday was the worst day this year - the evacuation and the pain of re-entering the festival. A few years ago we were evacuated from the festival because of storms. We made our way to Steve's Segway Tour and sat in a garage infested with Forbidden-Forest-sized spiders. This year we had wine and cheese flights at Eno Wine Bar. With age, comes wisdom.

Cheese makes everything better. Air conditioned bathrooms do too.

Worst Act: Holychild
How can I explain the mermaid/cheerleader stripper that was Holychild? Is it our fault for going to see someone who is trying to make 'Brat Pop' a thing? Probably. We sat. We watched. And then I started laughing uncontrollably. We got up to leave after awhile as the mermaid started another song. I looked back, horrified, as I realized that she was trying to sing a No Doubt song. When Gwen Stefani recalls her saddest moment of 2015 it won't be ending her 13-year-long marriage with Gavin Rossdale, but having Holychild sing 'Just a Girl.'

Audience looks on, stunned at what they see. "That was one UNholychild!" exclaims one festival-goer, disbelief in his eyes. 

Funniest Quotes:
Literally everything Father John Misty said during his set made me laugh. My favorite was, "I'm depressed. . . then I look out and see the Bud Light sign, and I realize the show must go on. Sorry, you're all on ecstasy anyway, what does it matter?"

Other great quotes, ""You guys ready for a f*cking ballad? That's what gets you the 2:30 PM slot. The f*ckin ballads."

Paul McCartney on the sound bleed from Perry's: "It's a crazy mashup. This song and whatever shit they're playing over there."

The sea of people at McCartney's show.

Elle King while trying to tune: "This shit's going to be out of tune for the entire show, but we're just going to roll with it."

Not only was Elle King funny, but there was a guy who was shame-eating an entire pizza like it was a slice of pizza. I gave him a 'I've-been-there-man' nod before looking away.

The most ridiculous quote all weekend? That would be from my husband. "I want to buy another hat so I can have one beater hat and one nice one." This is the hat that he's apparently going to be wearing ALL the time now. 

Note: He did not purchase another hat. Since the festival he's worn the hat 0 times and I've brought up this story 17,000 times.

2014 Lollapalooza: Best and Worst Moments

Another great Lollapalooza has come and gone. 2014 marks my 5th year attending the festival. A lot has changed over five years, but I think what's changed the most is my outlook. This was the first year that I finished the night at a smaller stage, instead of listening to one of the major headliners. Sunday's lineup was also the first in five years that I didn't really care about the majority of any of the acts. As with any multi-day festival, it's a long, but fun-filled experience. Below I've included the best and worst moments of 2014's Lollapalooza.

Best Stage: The Grove
The Grove has had an amazing lineup these past few years. It's easy to forget about it because it's hidden away under trees. It's the perfect stage to catch some early morning acts and, as we found out this year, to end the night. Ironically, the worst band we saw at The Grove is the band pictured below, Roadkill Ghost Choir. Their sound definitely sounded like it had been rotting away in the middle of a dirt road. We ended both nights at The Grove seeing Phantogram and Darkside. We also got our first taste of rain watching Gemini Club on Sunday and avoided getting drenched thanks to ponchos and the trees.

Best Day: Saturday

Maybe it's because Saturday had the best weather. Maybe it's because we ended it singing and dancing our way through Outkast's set, but Saturday was my favorite day of the weekend. Vance Joy, Fitz & The Tantrums, and Foster the People were just some of the highlights.

This is what Lollaplooza is all about. Sitting on a hill listening to great music with your friends.

Best Food: Lobster corndog

A little disappointed that the mustard-fried catfish was nowhere to be found, but I found solace in baskets of cheese fries, mushroom nachos, truffle parmesan popcorn, and lobster corndogs.

I have no pictures of the food, but this is what I looked like after eating non-stop for three days.

Best Throwback: Outkast

Am I old enough now to have a throwback band be music that I listened to in middle/high school? I guess so. Judging by the blank faces in the audience it also seems that Annika and I were the only ones who listened to more than just "Hey Ya!" I'm sorry Ms. Jackson, but there are better songs on Stankonia. Of course the blank faces could also have to do with the cloud of smoke that hovered over the crowd too. I think the best part of their set was that it just felt like watching two friends having fun.

Best Closer: Phantogram
Can I just start by saying how crazy it was that Phantogram was a closer? Just four years ago I was standing at the front of the stage at Lincoln Hall listening as Sarah Barthel whisper, "Hi we're Phantogram. We're from New York." in her little girl voice. And they were opening for The Antlers! But you don't know who The Antlers are? Exactly. They were opening for a band that most people haven't even heard of today. Now their songs are on commercials and they're closing out Friday night at Lollapalooza. I'm not saying it wasn't a deserved spot, they put on an amazing show, their new album Voices is fantastic, and I really have fallen in love with Fall In Love. I just haven't gotten over the shock at seeing their name at the end of the day. Thank goodness she still has that high pitch baby voice, which she is now using to tell her bandmate, Josh Carter, how much she "f'-ing loves his beats" instead of telling the audience their hometown.

Worst Day: Sunday

There are many reasons why Sunday was not my favorite. The constant rain. Having to wear a plastic poncho all day. Missing the opportunity to get closer to see the Avett Brothers because of the mud pits that were forming by the Samsung Galaxy stage. We came prepared for rain, so while it didn't soak our stuff it did dampen the day.

The only thing separating us from the Avett Brothers was mud. Lots and lots of mud.

Worst Act: Iggy Azalea

There are no pictures of this act because we stood at the edge of Perry's for about five minutes before deciding to get the heck out of there. It was so loud that you couldn't really hear any distinguishing sound or even a voice in all the obnoxious bass. After reading reviews of her set it sounds like we didn't miss too much. Sweaty teenagers puking all around? Sounds pretty "Fancy" to me.

Worst Stage: Perry's or Lakeshore
Perry's is hands-down the worst stage at Lollapalooza for all of the reasons above. It's so loud that it's kind of destroying the music at Lakeshore. It's impossible for acts like Warpaint, Lykke Li, or The Head and The Heart to compete with the constant bass at Perry's.

Lakeshore Stage in the background.

Favorite Quotes:

"ID's out if you want to drink. If you don't want to drink, why are you here?" said by the guy checking ID's at the front of the gate. We took advantage of the Uncorked Wine Lounge on Sunday when it rained non-stop for hours.

After a few minutes of serious sound issues from their pre-recorded track, the lead singer of Of Verona said, "None of this is pre-recorded...except for the parts that are pre-recorded."

Favorite Moment: Fitz & the Tantrums
Fitz & the Tantrums put on a great show on Saturday, but for me, these two below stole the entire set. As we were sitting on our favorite hill by the Samsung stage, we see this little boy (yellow shirt) start coming down the hill as The Walker starts. He sees a woman (white dress) dancing and you can tell by the look on his face that he's thinking, "I"m gonna ask that lady to dance!" Then they performed the best synchronized dance! It was the cutest thing I have ever seen.

Final Thoughts:

Why are people bringing kids to Lollapalooza? I get that there's a Kidzapalooza, but you still have to walk through regular Lollapalooza to get there. As much as I love this festival, I would never in a million years think about bringing a kid to witness all the disgusting and foul things that become part of Grant Park. We sat next to a family (mom, dad, and two kids) on Saturday and they were the worst kids ever! The little boy kept hitting his mom and throwing pennies in her beer and the little girl would not stop whining. Everyone was miserable. Including me. There are rare moments (like the Fitz & the Tantrum dancing) where it's cute that there's a kid there, but for the most part, leave your little ones at home.

This was the first year that I've been to an aftershow. It was actually a pre-show since it was the Wednesday before Lollapalooza, but I would definitely do it again! Bryan and I got to see Courtney Barnett play at Schubas Tavern from about five feet away. They put on an amazing show!

The Youngest Senior Citizen's Guide to Lollapalooza!

I'm not a fan of being outside or large groups of people, but put an amazing musical festival in the mix and you have my favorite time of the summer - Lollapalooza  About five years ago I started getting really into music and going to concerts in Chicago. Some shows I saw with friends, but the majority I saw by myself. It wasn't uncommon for me to listen to a band for the first time on Monday, look up where they were touring on Tuesday, by a ticket on Wednesday, and then hear them live on Thursday. After a few months of that, my friend Annika and I decided that we should go to Lollapalooza. Neither of us had shelled out more than $200 for a concert ticket before, but after looking at the three day lineup, we pulled the trigger and have gone every year since then. 2014 marks year 5 for us. We've learned a lot of lessons along the way that I thought I'd share here.

Lesson the First: Create Your Ticket Getting Strategy

Oh the days when Lolla tickets didn't sell out 20 seconds after they went on sale. Those were good years. Unfortunately, almost every year since our first year has been a crazy stressful experience. The past two years we weren't able to get tickets, but our friends were able to get in and bought 4 tickets. There are usually four types of tickets (besides the VIP tickets) that go on sale. The order is usually the lottery/secret sale-souvenir tickets, early bird 3 day pass, regular 3 day pass, and regular single day tickets. Here's how to get tickets:

• Follow Lollapalooza on Facebook or Twitter to get updates when the tickets will go on sale. Apart from this year, they've done a secret sale where they sell a handful of super discounted tickets online without officially announcing it. 

We won a pair of the souvenir passes one year and I'm pretty sure we've used up all the good fortune we'll ever have again. (It was worth it).

• If you're going with multiple people, have everyone log onto the site when tickets go on sale. Your odds are at least one of you will get through and can buy tickets for your group.

Lesson the Second: Do Your Research

After they release the lineup, listen to everyone who will be there. You can use their player that's on their website, but that typically only has a few songs on it. I use Spotify, YouTube, and Setlist.FM to do my listening research. Figure out who you like, who you hate, who you'd like to see perform live, and who has the least annoying fans.

Lesson the Third: Tough Love Time

All right so the schedule has finally been announced and all the bands you decided you liked in your research stage are playing at the same time. It's okay. Be smart about the schedule and remember that you have to be flexible. You're not going to see everyone you want to see, but you will get to experience some bands who weren't even on your list that will become your new favorites.

Planning our day - notice the highlighting. Now we've moved into the 21st century and use the Lolla app on our phone.

Also, think about the bands that you might not get the chance to see.

We had a great view of the Postal Service's last show (besides the show at the Metro they played right after this)

Lesson the Fourth: Pack A Bag - Things To Take With You

• Tickets (seems like a no-brainer, but I literally forgot mine the first year and had to go all the way back to get them)
• Fully charged cell phone (even though you probably won't have service)
• Money - bring a credit card and cash, they have ATM's there, but why get charged the fee if you can just bring enough with you
• Factory sealed water bottle or empty bottle to refill for free at their water stations

Small umbrella - it's rained almost every year we've been there for some amount of time. It's also good for blocking the sun when it's 800 degrees out.

• Plastic Ziplock bag for your phone for when it rains
• If you have room, it's worth it to put a garbage bag at the bottom of your bag in case it does rain so you can protect your stuff

Blanket to lounge on (we buy the cheap throws at IKEA)

• Kleenex which can double for toilet paper when they inevitably run out of it on Day 2/3
• Hand sanitizer - see above  

Sun block - it's hot out there

• Bug spray - if you're like me and get eaten alive in the summertime
• Mini-first aid kit - I just bring Band-Aids and a little tube of first aid cream for minor cuts

Lesson the Fifth: Relax!

Lollapalooza is a huge event and running around to the different stages is not the best way to spend your weekend.

• Check out the merch booths and if you want to buy a shirt, do it when you first get there to ensure you get the shirt and size you want

Spend time at the wine lounge - they usually give away a bunch of free stuff and it's mostly shaded

Eat your heart out at all the delicious food vendors - food at Lollapalooza is basically a less expensive version of Taste of Chicago with less suburban families and more hipsters (Hello, Rainbow Cone)

Enjoy the beautiful views of the city