Sunday, May 4, 2014

Everything I Know About Hockey I Learned from the Mighty Ducks Movies

Which means I know nothing about hockey and spend the majority of my time wondering why the teams are not doing the Flying V. I spent a great deal of my childhood watching these movies over and over. At one point, I even had memorized all the players names and numbers. I even used to "skate" around our kitchen in my socks holding a broom or a croquet mallet (because it was the early 1900's, obviously). Watching hockey is definitely not as exciting as watching the Mighty Ducks. I usually cycle through a few different thoughts every time I watch.

What I think about when I watch hockey:

  • What if there were other sports where you could "legally" fight? Like basketball or even better - tennis. They certainly shout at the line judge enough. What if they just hopped the net, rackets flying, and started throwing punches? I bet a lot more people would start watching.
  • Much to Bryan's dismay, I also like to attempt to commentate the game. It usually goes like this:
    • Allison: "Okay, that guy has the puck and is skating over there...where did the puck go? I can't find the puck. Bryan, do you see the puck? Oh, there it is, that other guy has it now. Wait, I lost it again."
    • Bryan: "Can you please stop doing that now?"
  • How many people have died playing hockey?
  • I wish Quidditch was real.
  • What house would I be in if I went to Hogwarts? 
  • Why are we watching this much hockey? 
  • Why are these games on so late?
  • I miss the Olympics.
Sadly, real hockey is not like my beloved childhood movie trilogy. But it sure beats football.

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